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- Name: matty
- Location: San Francisco, California, United States
"When the lights go out in the cinema, the dream begins..." Rainer Werner Fassbinder
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Wednesday, May 03, 2006
13 Comments:
Move to the UK matty - you can sleep on my sofa for however long you want. Even better still if you do the cooking and cleaning. you can listen to Goldfrapp all day if you like!
No! Matty has to stay here! He can visit the UK, but he has to stay in San Fran with me and Goldfrapp! Please, Jane, don't steal Matty away with your siren Australian National Anthem songs!
Ohhh the lady on the bed has knickers that match my socks!
Lets cut him in half Ing. I'll have the top half and you have the bottom half and then we swap, yeah?
Deal. Except, I want the top half first. It helps me find my way around the city. Or correction: it distracts me with stories while I'm driving around lost in the city, and then I don't worry about crashing my car, and then I don't. And here's a tip: the bottom half looks best in jeans -- we want the bottom half to look its best while in the UK, yeah? Unless you can convince it to don a kilt.
I fear this may be impractical. How about we slice him lengthways? That way he can keep one eye on the traffic and one eye on Buckingham palace. And he gets to wiggle half a cute bun in each city, thereby doubling his chances of getting laid?
Perfect! Should we set him up with someone at Buckingham Palace, then, just to sort of streamline all this? Harry or William? Or, for that matter, Chaz?
No let's not bother with Chaz. His ears are too large and I don't think he's make a good Queen.
Lets go for William - only the best for our Matty, eh?
Yayyyyy! That leaves Harry for me!
Pixie -- Way cool socks! Now, you just need the knickers!!!
Jungle jane --- I feel so loved, but I fear I can barely keep myself afloat in SF. Not sure how I would manage in the UK -- green cards and all. But, Goldfrapp all the day long just for cleaning (um, does instant oatmeal count as cooking????)
Ing -- I'm not going anywhere. Just a pipe dream. Unless you want to run to the UK!?!?!?
Um, well, I'm not sure I want to be cut in half. ...or sideways. But, if I am --- I think I'm hot for that actor on that britcom, Green Wing, ...the younger blonde resident doctor with the short hair who is sort of a smart ass. I can't think of his character's name. But, he's hot. I want him over royalty. But, I think I would need my whole body.
Hmmmm... A kilt.
OK -- I've had loads of water. It is 6:20am -- I'm off to work!!!! Yay!
Not to rain on your parade, but England like everywhere else in the world is not devoid of race isues, ignorance, or any problems that plague developed nations. trust me on this....
and woo hoo for Goldfrapp!!
very american of mz Frappe. to just put it out there...
-g+bb
England has its fair share of problems too, like a growing rise in the number of 'chavs' that have ditched the Queen's English in favour of something altogether dumbed-down.
However, come to rural Leicestershire and see how beautiful it is. You're only an hour away from some of the major cities and two hours from London.
Hope you feel better soon.
With best wishes from Quorn x
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