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Thursday, January 12, 2006

A BRUSH WITH PORN GREATNESS!

As I stood at the customer counter of the place where I get my mail and ripped open the silly plain white plastic envelope containing my new edition of UNZIPPED (the gay man's Tiger Beat for Porn) --- nothing could have prepared me for my delight! I squealed like one of those girls in the early 60's when she was handed a new Beatles single! There, on the cover of UNZIPPED ---- my favorite porn star, Johnny Hazzard!!!

Now, I've actually met Mr. Hazzard. I shall share the story with you now!

I guess it has been about 2 summers ago. In Ptown. I saw a cluster of boys looking into the windows of one of those over-priced but great fun clothing shops at the end of Commericial Street. I was surprised to discover that only I and one other guy actually entered the store. Why were all those boys looking but not coming in? I muttered this question aloud and this really cute/sweet boy behind the counter answered, "I know. Isn't it silly?"

...I started to say something but the kid suddenly slipped off the stool behind the cash register! Both myself and the other customer rushed over to make sure he was ok. Bright red, he told us he was fine and called himself clumbsy. He then went back to sewing a patch on to a shirt. I asked him if he was one of the designers of the clothes that the shop sold. He was so cute and shy. He blushed and told me that he just liked to play around but that he was not a designer. He was quite good looking but very tiny. He was a bit fem which seemed sweet. I bought some t-shirt for $30. Oi! Anyway, as he rung me up I took notice of this tat that was showing thru his mesh shirt. It looked so familiar, but I couldn't decide why.

As I walked out of the store, one of the gawking guys rushed me and asked what "we" had talked about. I didn't even understand what he was asking me but noticed that all the men were now listening. Finally one of the guys said, "Dude, that's Johnny Hazzard!"

I turned and realized that it WAS Johnny Hazzard! I had just met my favorite porn star since Joey Steffano and I hadn't even realized it! Ugh!

Well, that was my brush with porn royalty.

I suppose he was just doing someone a favor and minding the store. I think he was performing in Boston later that week. I can't remember. We saw him walking around one other time that weekend.

The resulting problem is that now, when I see him looking all studly, hot and porn-ish --- I can only think of that sweet boy sewing behind the counter of that little Ptown shop. It's funny how we forget that it really is all acting. And, I bet acting in porn is one of the hardest acting gigs there is! Anyway, Mr. Hazzard is most def. on the rise. Last year he was modeling the new line of clothes by Boy George and now he is in Hollywood!

If there is any justice he should be able to cross over into the art house films! Someone needs to cast him! He deserves to be a total star!!!

8 Comments:

Blogger snarl71 said...

OH, Matt..in your porn-star admiration haze you seem to forget that it was ME who asked you "isn't that Johnny Hazzard?" while we were still in the store.

We were with David and Chad, remember?

FYI - he was there last summer, too...and another porn star was there (didn't know him, though).

6:25 AM  
Blogger Robert said...

So, so... Did he come in your mouth? Owait.

He sews? A crazy [yet clutzy] guy indeed. hehee! But I still don't know who he is. *sigh* Anyway, it was good to have a little 'connection' with you yesterday. heh!

7:03 AM  
Blogger matty said...

Karl -- NO! You were annoyed that I still wanted to go shopping so I met up with you guys later and told you about it! I was alone in my shopping! Then, because there was interest, we walked back over later and it was Chad who asked to ensure that I wasn't wrong!! Then, when we were at Bubbala's we saw him walking about. Porn haze! You never went in that shop that summer! LOL! Ah, PTown.

Robert - Dirty boy! LOL! It was cool "connecting" with you as well! Sorry so slow on the pick up. Not good with those new fankled gadgets! LOL!

10:11 AM  
Blogger Robert said...

Oops. Didn't mean to say 'a crazy guy'... meant to say 'a crafy guy'... Why am I so careless!?!? Geez. Have a great weekend Matt! :-*

6:31 PM  
Blogger ing said...

Wowser.

12:50 AM  
Blogger Robert said...

"CRAFTY!" GOD!!!

2:00 PM  
Blogger matty said...

Oh, Robert -- I knew what you meant. His beauty can be quite distracting! Get all type-tied.

8:05 PM  
Blogger Tim said...

In that image at that angle he looks a lot like Aiden Shaw I think. Spooky.

5:24 PM  

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