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Thursday, April 06, 2006

"GAY MUCH?!?!"
...This is what the sales clerk asked me as I approached his register clutching my copy of the DVD DeLux Collector's Edition of "LIZA WITH A Z" -- the infamous Bob Fosse produced/directed TV special from the early 70's staring Liza Minnelli. When he asked me this I responded by saying, "Yes. Far too much. And, you?" ...He then responded, "Yes, but not THIS much! Wow, dude! You're so totally gay!" It was funny.

The fact is that I do not really care for most of Ms. Minnelli's work. I mean I thought she was awesome in CABARET. ...and, I do love the soundtrack to this TV special. My Grandmother got it for me when I was about 5 years old. She knew I loved Barbra and felt that Babs and Liza were one in the same. Not so. But, I do still enjoy this record. So, I am a very excited to finally be able to watch AND listen!!! Yay! ...whenever I see Liza Minnelli in anything other than CABARET I have to fight the urge to scream, "Honey, calm down! You've got the job! They hired you! Turn it down a couple of notches and breathe!" ...Liza is just so high-strung. She makes me nervous.

When I mentioned the upcoming release of this DVD to Ing she commented about Liza. I think Liza either scares Ing or also makes her very nervous. However, Ing is known to skin skunks. But, I've done FAR worse. So, maybe Liza makes us both nervous.

Anyway, I am looking forward to watching this spectacle from 1972! When Liza was thin and had the world in the palm of her hand. ...who knew?!?!?

As it is Poetry month I know many of you are thinking of classic poems. I am not. I love poetry and am familiar with a great deal of it. Degree in English Lit and all, but today I am thinking of a poem to beat all poems. I shall share it with you now.

"You see, it's Liza with a Z
Not Lisa with an S
'Cause Lisa with an S goes 'snssss'
It's 'Lie' instead of 'Lee'
It's simple as can be
See 'Liza'?

Now if my name were Ada, I'd be Ada.
Even backwards I'd be Ada
Or if my name were Ruth, then I'd be Ruth.
Because with Ruth what can you do?
Or Sally. Or Margaret. Or Ginger. Or Faye.

But when you're a Liza you always have to say,
It's Liza with a Z
Not Lisa with an S
'Cause Lisa with an S goes 'snssss'
It's 'Lie' instead of 'Lee'
It's simple as can be
See 'Liza'?

Oh, and that is only half of it!
There is another way they treat me cruelly
How often I remember someone saying,
'Oh there she goes, Lisa Minnulie'"

Well, yeah. Gay an awful lot. ...and, on so very many levels! But it is all so bright, sparkling, pink and over-the-top -- how can one resist?!?!?!


Blogger ing said...

Is that a Gerard Manley Hopkins poem? Or wait, it must be Walt Whitman, gay, much?

My room is still only 80% clean, and I am 10% drunk. Time to read -- I love reading, man! I am SUCH the dork!

11:43 PM  
Blogger matty said...

Isn't it cool that Walt wrote a poem for Liza!?!?! ...With a Z!?!?

Well, 80% clean and 10% drunk -- you're close to 100% --- depending upon how you want to look at it! Right?

And, babe, you ARE NOT a dork! I feel you are perfection in high heels and way cool babydoll T's! You so rock, Ing!!!! ...a hero!

11:48 PM  
Blogger Chris Capp said...

Hey Matt,

"You've got the job!" That is hilarious! You are so right about Miss Liza trying oh-so-hard every second. For some reason my cable company was sending Showtime for free last weekend and I caught a few minutes of this legendary show. It felt like a bombardment to me -- visually, aurally, in every way. And, call me crazy, but I swear she was lip-synching at one point.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy it. And, by the way Ing, Gerard Manley Hopkins didn't write "Liza with a Z." But he did pen the lyrics to "Losing My Mind."

9:58 AM  
Blogger ginab said...

To fess up, yep she's a hyper-diaper (or let us hope not) that Liza Mmmmmmm...rhymes with?

The one to make me cringe as if by instinct from beyond my beginning in this life has and remains Bernadette Peters (is that her first name?). Drove me to run before walking from the television during one of the several variety shows deep in the sixties and extending into the seventies (when I could run, but often fell down anyway). Combined? Her enthusiasm for singing really crappy songs through slippery lipsticked lips against soap skin. Blech. Blechy blech. gag me with a spoon.

But I shouldn't talk. I've just pitched some of the crappiest writing in the history of the world. My name appears on each cover page. Good gawd. What is this industry? Higher education? Bunk.

Busy packing. Thankfully, I found a boat load of blank postcards! You'll be hearing from me buddy boy. Oh so gay! These p-cards are courtesy of the Netherlands. Free all over the cafes and bars there. To be had and grabbed and I stole off with the loot (just forgot that I did). I'm in p-cards for, oh, 365 days.


8:00 PM  
Blogger ing said...

Ethel Merman. I can't take that. (Liza too -- sorry, Mattster.)

Postcards!! I need to send a few to your new pad, ginab, so you'll immediately receive some non-bill mail!

9:24 PM  
Blogger matty said...

Chris -- Yes! She did lip sync during two numbers! I was shocked! I was also surprised at the poor quality -- shakey/hand held cameras, bad lighting, etc. I only know of variety shows of this sort at that period by Streisand and the quality/budgets are so much better. I guess I was expecting to see something of that quality. The dancing was good, tho. And, I know all that music. I did enjoy the extra features. I find it amusing to watch Liza get wound up and just sort of "go" ...bezerk.

Gina -- LOL! Yeah, B. Peters. Well, I have to tell you -- if you ever get the chance to see her perform in a Sondheim production you should give it a shot. I think she might be the ultimate Sondheim performer. I think he even writes with her in mind. However, I don't enjoy her other stuff. Just Sondheim. Oh, and the fact that she hid from the sun for 30 years to avoid any aging of her skin amuses me. And, I guess she racks up bonus points for being Steve Martin's longest lover. ...tho, they broke up years ago.

Ingrid! Beck, watch out!!!

12:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG - she lip-syncs LOADS of this tv special. Remember they didn't have those diddy headsets way back then. I shall never shake my head at Madonna again - she has tremendous stamina compared to Liza!

2:26 PM  
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