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Saturday, January 21, 2006

C'EST LA VIE & BARING ALL...


I turned 20 in November of 1986. So, I was still a kid for all practical purposes. I think this excuses the fact that I secretly LOVED the songs of Robbie Neville and I also thought he was incredibly hot in an androgynous-Kenny-G-but-with-better-hair kind of way. I had the cassette tape, but I don't think anyone knew that I had it. I played it in my car on my way to/from work and school. I used to crank it up, but only when I was in the car alone. Robbie Neville was my secret. Well, now is the time to shed all shame and run my Freak Flag up the pole. Yes, I was a total Robbie Neville fan! And, dammit -- I may not be proud of this fact but I fully own it!

This was all stirred up when I walked thru amoeba Records in the Haight. I was killing time and decided to roam thur the $1 bins in search of an old Curve CD. Well, my heart was flooded with nostalgia and teen lust when I came across the long forgotten self-titled CD which contained Mr. Neville's one hit and forever made him a total wonder. Sure, he sang harmony with Stevie Nicks on her rendition of "Silent Night" but that was about it as far as I know. Anyway, I paid my $1.10 and was bouncing about the job boards this morning to the mellow, yet rocking MOR voice of Robbie Neville. Sigh.

AND --- a photograher recently asked me if I would be willing to pose for him. Nude.

My first reaction was "NO WAY!!!" but then the more I thought about it the more I liked the idea. First of all, at 39 -- how many more times in my life will someone willingly ask me going to be naked for them!?!? And, it might be cool to be able to look back at my nude 39 year old self when I am 79. Also, one of my life goals is to fully experience this life and all the possibilities it has to offer. Posing nude might be a very "freeing" experience.

I don't have to sign a waiver unless I am happy with the results and he promises that I will look good. I worry due to my odd nose and feet. I don't like the way my feet look. I used to like the way they looked, but at some point in my late 20's they took on an orge sort of impression. When I confessed my concerns he told me that his nude subjects never voiced concern over their noses or feet. So, I asked him if that made me odd. He said yes but that he still wanted me to pose anyway -- if I was comfortable and still up for it. So to speak...

Anyway, I shall soon be baring all! Time will tell if anyone ever gets to see the pictures other than me and the photographer. He is amateur with hopes of going professional. Hmmm...

If the pictures, by some miracle, come out looking good --- maybe I will attach them to my resume. I really need a job. I should think everyone wants a nude Office Manager. Right?

17 Comments:

Blogger g said...

Hey, now... Robbie Nevil was nothing to be ashamed of, and I believe his second single, 'Dominoes' charted in the top ten, as well. And yes, I do have both of those singles on vinyl -- no shame here!

But enough of THAT hot guy, let's talk about the OTHER hot guy. What is all this about your nose? Is there something wrong with your nose that we can't see in photographs? Because you're fairly photogenic. Not that we've seen your feet out here, but I hardly think any of us will be looking at your feet in that nude photo...

2:25 AM  
Blogger matty said...

Gator! I didn't know that "Dominoes" was a hit single!?!? Wow! Cool!

Well, my nose was broken when I was kid and it was never really addressed. So, I've always felt it looks odd. I don't worry about it or anything but don't we all normally look at the nose in nude photos. I know it is the first thing I notice! LOL! Maybe he can photoshop and give me Robbie's nose!

2:36 AM  
Blogger Karyn said...

Matty! Scandal! Although I applaud your stones of steel. Give it up with your nose and who gives a rat's ass about your feet - very few of us have really lovely feet. (I want a pedicure but I'm sure the pedicurist will take one look at my feet and tell me to go to PetSmart instead -) Ya Gawgeous! Be careful though, you don't want to find out once you are nekkid that this guy is planning to do something bad. Take someone with you!!!

Is it going to be a Bare-All situation or is it more artistic-modest where you are clearly naked but keeping yourself in the shadows?

Exciting stuff. I personally have never wanted a naked office manager, but if I'd had one, I'm sure it'd have been a good point of conversation when I was feeling wicked. >=)

5:33 AM  
Blogger Dessie said...

Maybe nobody *wants* a nude office manager, but if they knew they were available, they'd *need* one. See? Go for it.

As for the pics, we can't possibly comment until they're fully posted on this blog.

7:11 AM  
Blogger thomas said...

i will totally be looking at your feet now. and you'll probably catch me staring at your nose. you should never have said anything.

7:19 AM  
Blogger ginab said...

Well, the transition from teen lust to a self nudy was a little gruff, but by all means people would come to work just to see the office manager a la b-day suit. Speaking of which, my aunt is a grandma. The details? Forget about it. It's a miracle anybody is HERE. Just too gross and painful in my mind.

But we were talking about naked office managers. Who will be looking at your feet, silly? No one in their right mind!

-g+bb

PS: fyi: I think Ing likes "Hair"but more she likes that superstar Jesus.

7:31 AM  
Blogger Joe said...

who is robbie neville?

and can I have one of your nude photos? :)

7:49 AM  
Blogger ing said...

I'm with Karyn here -- do you feel absolutely comfortable around/with the photographer? I'm not so concerned about the photo session itself, as I trust your judgment, but what, exactly, is this man going to do with your photos after they're taken? Please read that waiver carefully!

Honestly, Matt, broken noses are cool & add character.

8:18 AM  
Blogger matty said...

Karyn -- I wonder if PetSmart would do my feet for little money?!?!? LOL! I'm always careful and safe about things. So, no need to worry!

Dessie -- You know this could be a corporate revolution! Ya never know! Um, no I don't think there will be any posting of my pix here, but I did tell him he has to take a normal one so I can use it for my blog picture. So, that might happen if I like the picutre.

Thomas --- I always knew you had a thing for feet.

ginab -- Yeah, I guess my feet will not be the focus of the picture. But, I don't like 'em. I love "Superstar" ...I like the song where they are all asking Jesus "What's the buzz? Tell us what is happenin'" ...but my concern is that my other fave musical number from that show is the "trial" where they chant about crucifying. ...a bit disturbing to find yourself humming and singing that as you're doing the dishes. ...even worse when I go into the portion singing/counting the whip licks! Oh, and I like that song where the King ridicules Christ. I mean, it is just so subversive to be sarcastically singing for him to turn the water into wine. Much easier to sing about Frank Mills. How did I go off to this tangent?

Joe!?!? Robbie N! He was at once great and really bad! That is his picture! ummmm, no. LOL!

ing -- Oh yeah, it is fine and safe. I don't see myself becoming pals with him -- a bit too self-important, I think. I think it will be an interesting experience. I will probably laugh/giggle too much and ruin any possible shots. I never thought of my nose as cool or adding character, but I will try to work with that!

11:49 AM  
Blogger ginab said...

Tangents are great, Matty. Nice little storm on Superstar.

Speaking of a superstar, and because you'd wanted to know more, my cousin and his wife had their first baby yesterday. I learned the news this morning from my aunt who is, yep, a grandma. She beams, and Adeline Jane, the newest person on the planet, is a warm, quiet bundle. I wore a cashmere sweater to visit, in case I would hold her (and I did) so she wouldn't feel a thing but the best softness. My aunt did grind into me somewhat as I held little Adeline; makes you want one of your own, doesn't it?. She'd asked me hopefully, but really I'll be forty and I don't believe anyone, as they never have, could love me fast, as in suddenly, and forever, to swing it. Later, far from the hospital, I explained to her that I would like to be wealthy enough to start a small scholarship and perhaps, in some other way, also change another person's life. I don't know that I can do either. Seems too much to ask in prudent sexist America. Not easy, as you know, being as we are--alone, affording only ourselves. If I were you I would bottle your optimism tho. There's a market. I would eat ten viles.

For now, I'll embrace the joy I witnessed on my cousin's face.

6:15 PM  
Blogger matty said...

Gina -- You never know. Just as soon as you think something will never happen, it does! And, I mean that in a positve way. Love and life can surprise!
I hope that, one day, I will have my crap together and might be able to be a foster parent to a teen. I always feel that there are so few options for kids of that age when trapped in a bad situation. I would like to be able to provide something positve in that way. ...someday. I hope.

12:15 AM  
Blogger ing said...

Try not to get worried
Try not to turn on to
Problems that upset you
oh Don't you know
Everything's alright
Yes everything's fine
And we want you to sleep well tonight
Let the world turn without you tonight
If we try
We'll get by
So forget all about us tonight

This song is also a little creepy -- Mary Magdalen is basically telling Jesus to relax and forget about all of humanity just before everyone comes after him and like nails him up because the sins of the world are now his responsibility. Hosannah hey, matey!

So yeah, "Everything's All Right" is my favorite, but Matty! Have you heard Sandra Bernhart's medley of "Everything's All Right" and Hendrix's "Manic Depression" (e.g. "Manic Superstar")? Wow!

I've never seen Superstar the musical, but the movie was AWESOME!

1:17 AM  
Blogger matty said...

ing -- Yeah, that is an odd song. I guess there is something oddly subversive about that whole musical. I love the way that movie starts with the bus and film crew arriving to the outskirts of the Holy Land. I once saw a really lame production done by a community theatre in Texas. I would like to see an actual production of HAIR. I hated the movie! It was so disco-like, tame and literal. ...And Mrs. Garrett was in it. That spooked me!

Oh, you know I love Ms. Bernhard! I have several of her CD's! I love that one and that track. ...so odd and twisted. Just the way I love Sandra!

...why am I still up at 2am!?!?!?

1:46 AM  
Blogger ing said...

Hey, I just asked myself the same question on your C. picture posting. Except it's 3am here, and I have to get up at 8:00.

I hate having to sleep.

Nighty night.

3:03 AM  
Blogger Andrew said...

I would so pay to see that picture. Phwoar.

8:48 AM  
Blogger Tim said...

Wow Matt, you've certainly had your fair share of interesting experiences since you moved to SF! Keep on blogging about them please!!

5:30 PM  
Blogger matty said...

Mr. Trashbinder -- for a picture of me!!?!?!? LOL!

Tim -- Fear not, my friend. All is blog worthy and all shall be reported!

7:49 PM  

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